Yes, the sun is blazing and fun is being had, which means it must be time once again for our intrepid heroes to close the curtains, open some bottles and spend what is arguably the best part of the year huddled indoors furiously scribbling notes at the idiot's lantern about programmes that normal people watched three or four decades ago then promptly forgot.
In this trailer for the exciting NEW SERIES of The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour, normal televisual service is resumed as Doctor Velvet and Blackout nurse a crushing hangover with The Moomins, pop over for drinks with My Husband And I, and invite Ozzy Bognops round to test the very nature of reality in the Science Workshop.
What is the Scandinavian for "a double alka seltzer, two hot dogs and back to bed for an hour while you STOP playing that flute"? Who has the right - or the might - to pick up Alan White's gauntlet of going round shops to perform impromptu audits on their scales? And how do we still not have day-jobs that involve necking Sherry with Mollie Sudgen in her office at 3pm?
The answers lie shortly after pressing that Play button...
WE HAVE BEEN WATCHING: Programme: The Moomins Broadcast: Monday 24 January, 1983 Production/Channel: Semaphore / Jupiter Film / FilmFair, BBC One Writer: Lucjan Dembinski, Maria Kossakowska, Tove Jansson, Anne Wood Music: Graeme Miller, Steve Shill Director: Lucjan Dembinski Starring: Richard Murdoch (voice)
Programme: My Husband And I Broadcast: Friday 09 January, 1987 Production/Channel: Yorkshire Television, ITV Writer: Pam Valentine, Michael Ashton Producer/Director: Graham Wetherell Starring: Mollie Sugden, William Moore, Deddie Davies, Carol Hawkins
Programme: Science Workshop Broadcast: Wednesday 18 January, 1984 Production/Channel: BBC Schools Writer: Eurfron Jones Producer/Director: Michael Coyle Starring: David Hargreaves, Lilian Evans, Malcolm McFee
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The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet, with additional live accompaniments by Ozzy Bognops. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to PeggyMountPod@gmail.com
Okay, it's all very well handing in the paperwork for a superhero flick at the pitch meeting and then blowing the budget on a spy caper (yes Disney, we're looking at you) but at MountPeg Towers, capes are taken incredibly seriously. To redress the balance, our heroes have invited round the gentlemen from The ExtonMoss Experiment to form a committee for auditing silver spandex on celluloid...
And tasked with bringing the very best of cutting-edge contemporary superhuman cinema to the luxury screening room, Producer Ken has returned from Ritz with a jar of picked eggs and 1983's The Return Of Captain Invincible. It is unclear whether the tape has been rewound or just never before rented out.
How does one go about making a superhero film in the wake of Richard Donner's Superman - and starring Sir Christopher Ruddy Lee, no less - which will remain largely unseen, even in an age obsessed with superheroes? How does one maintain that it's definitely a superhero film when it features an entire song comprising lyrically of one swear-word and a scene with thirty possessed Hoovers? And what's the refund policy at the video shop?
Turn on your magnet-powers and feel the draw toward that Play button...
WE HAVE BEEN WATCHING: Title: The Return of Captain Invincible Original release: 1983 Studio/Distributor: Seven Keys Writer: Steven E. de Souza / Andrew Gaty Music: William Motzing (score)
Producer: Andrew Gaty Director: Philippe Mora Starring: Alan Arkin, Christopher Lee, Kate Fitzpatrick, Michael Pate
...and if you want to read some words about the film which aren't quite so rambunctous, you can do that here:
The Return of Captain Invincible isn't currently available on the big streaming services, but fans of physical media can snag it on VHS, DVD and Blu-ray.
You can Subscribe, Like, Follow, Rate and Review on:
The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet, with additional live accompaniments by Ozzy Bognops. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to PeggyMountPod@gmail.com
Summer has well and truly arrived outside MountPeg Towers, and since the Happy Shopper set up their own de-liver service it can largely stay there. Faced with the unpleasant prospect of putting in the effort to get fresh air, the intrepid hosts of The Peggy Mount Sunday Matinee Hour decide the only people they want to interact with is regular guest Ozzy Bognops, so invite him round to drink port and watch a video. Again.
What's needed before the great outdoors (and/or unwashed) can be braved is some good old fashioned moral fortitude, and where better to scrape inspiration than the 1982 crime caper The Boys In Blue? Starring Messrs Cannon and Ball, it's sure to be high on laughs if not on octane. You'd think.
How is it that TV-promo spots and display merchandising turn out to be more memorable than the films they're tasked to advertise? How did a top-notch supporting cast manage to not have their careers mothballed after starring in a Confessions film without the smut? And how is it that three podcasters finished recording this episode and then talked for another 45 minutes about a film they'd spent an hour dismissing?
Fire up the siren, call in a 10-51 and find out...
WE HAVE BEEN WATCHING: Title: The Boys In Blue Studio/Distributor: M.A.M., Rank Film Distributors Writer: Val Guest Music: Ed Welch Producer: Brian Fox Director: Val Guest Starring: Tommy Cannon, Bobby Ball, Suzanne Danielle, Roy Kinnear, Eric Sykes, John Pertwee, Jack Douglas, Arthur English
And you, dear reader, may not quite remember The Boys In Blue, but rest assured it was A Thing...
...and if you want to read some words about the film which aren't quite so impertinent, you can do that here:
The Boys In Blue isn't currently available for streaming, but someone has uploaded the whole thing to YouTube and the rights-holders haven't requested it be taken down in the last six years, so what does that tell you? Fans of physical media can fill their shelves with the video tape and DVD. Ed Welch's magnificent soundtrack isn't out as an album for your music centre, but the 7" single of the title-song is.
You can Subscribe, Like, Follow, Rate and Review on:
The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet, with additional live accompaniments by Ozzy Bognops. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to PeggyMountPod@gmail.com
